Legal separation can be a challenging and emotionally turbulent process, and seeking guidance from a therapist in North Carolina can provide invaluable support during this “year-and-a-day.” In this blog, we will explore the various challenges individuals face when going through a legal separation in North Carolina. We will also discuss coping strategies and skills that can help manage feelings of uncertainty, grief, financial stressors, maintaining relationships with extended family and friends, adapting to living separately, and navigating coparenting responsibilities.
Dealing with Uncertainty and Grief
Legal separation often brings feelings of uncertainty and grief as individuals face the ending of their marriage. This may be especially true in North Carolina, where a person is eligible to file for divorce only after being separated for at least a year and a day. This is a long time, and leaves many feeling unsettled and uncertain, unable to formally move forward with the legal divorce process.
It’s essential to acknowledge these varying, and valid, emotions and allow oneself to mourn the loss. Engaging in healthy coping skills such as journaling, engaging in creative outlets, or seeking therapy from a therapist in North Carolina can help process these emotions more effectively.
Financial Stressors and Stability
One of the biggest concerns we hear from clients who are going through a separation are concerns about finances. “How will I pay for my own place?” “How can our children continue to enjoy the life they have had thus far, with such a significant change in our family expenses.” “Lawyers are SO expensive!”
It is crucial to assess your financial situation and seek professional advice if needed. Creating a realistic budget, seeking employment or additional sources of income, and exploring housing rental options can help establish financial stability and reduce anxiety. There are some excellent Facebook groups full of resources for those seeking new or different employment, including Triangle Career Care Team and Triangle NC Jobs.
Additionally, if you are seeking information and support on managing the financial burden of separation and divorce, please consider reaching out to Charles Calloway of Primerica Advisors. Likewise, Jessica Garcia of Brainstorming Women offers Divorce Financial Services for Women.
Maintaining Relationships with Extended Family and Mutual Friends
Legal separation affects not only the couple but also their relationships with extended family and mutual friends. Open communication and honest conversations can help navigate these dynamics. Setting boundaries, maintaining neutrality, and focusing on the positive aspects of these relationships can help preserve connections while respecting individual boundaries and choices. Ultimately, if someone is no longer taking a supportive stance towards you, it may be time for you to consider their place in your world as well. Doing so is never easy, and compounds on to the overall grief of an already difficult situation; however, your happiness and well-being is most important. Working with a therapist in North Carolina to navigate these changing relationships and process these difficult emotions can also help!
Adjusting to Living Separately
Adjusting to living separately after being in a long-term relationship can be overwhelming. Establishing new routines, seeking social opportunities, and creating a living environment that reflects your unique needs and interests can facilitate the transition. Want your bathroom theme to be pineapples (Married at First Sight, anyone)? You do you! Want a room dedicated to your games? You’ve got it! Looking to finally do a shoe wall like they have on HGTV? Well, shoe-ly you can! Finding joy in and celebrating creating your space can be helpful in this big adjustment.
Likewise, engaging in self-care activities, such as taking time to rest, engaging in physical exercise, and consuming nutritious meals, can promote overall well-being during this challenging adjustment period.
Coparenting and Child Well-Being
For couples with children, coparenting is a crucial aspect of legal separation. Maintaining effective communication, creating a parenting plan, prioritizing the child’s best interests, and establishing consistent routines can help create a stable environment for children. Seeking professional guidance from a family therapist in North Carolina or attending coparenting classes can offer valuable strategies and support in navigating coparenting challenges. Likewise, modeling health behaviors, such as normalizing emotions, taking care of yourself, and avoiding negatively speaking about the other parent can also set your child up for success.
Working with a family therapist in North Carolina can help you both to figure out how best to tell your children about the separation, in age-appropriate language. Likewise, a family therapist in North Carolina can assist you both in developing strategies for cooperative co-parenting in a neutral environment, with the child’s best interests in mind. A therapist in North Carolina can also help you to understand signs to watch out for that might indicate your child is struggling with the separation, such as changes in biological functioning, social withdrawal, and how to manage separation anxiety. A family therapist can also help you to get connected with a child therapist in North Carolina, should your child benefit from their own space to explore and consider their varying emotions.
Get Support Now! Virtual Separation Therapeutic Support Group for Clients in North Carolina
Reaching out mental health professionals can provide a vital support system during legal separation. These professionals can offer guidance, coping strategies, and resources to help individuals navigate the emotional and practical aspects of separation.
However, connecting with others who are currently navigating legal separation in North Carolina is invaluable. Virtual therapy groups specifically designed for individuals going through marital separation in North Carolina offers the opportunity to connect with others who “just get it” in a supportive, professionally-led space. These groups provide a safe space to share experiences, gain insights from others, and receive support from individuals who can relate to the challenges of legal separation. Therapists leading these groups offer guidance and facilitate discussions to foster healing and growth. Likewise, you will be encouraged to engage in self-reflection, explore your personal interest, set goals, and gain tools and feedback to help rebuild you sense of self and boost self-esteem.
Register Today for Our Virtual Therapeutic Support Group!
When Two Becomes One: Navigating Challenges and Changes During Separation
Led by a marriage and family therapist in North Carolina, Shantell Carraway LMFT (she/her), participants will gain a sense of community and support from others who understand what it’s like to be in this new stage of life.
Group begins Wednesday 05/31 and occurs every Wednesday from 7-8pm for five weeks.
For more information or to register, please email info@beboldpsychnc.com or call/text 919-525-1873. Interested participants can also self-schedule a free 20 minute consult with Shantell on our website!
Other Therapy Services We Offer Online, and in Raleigh, North Carolina
Our supportive and affirming therapists offer inclusive individual therapy, couples counseling, and group therapy. And, with our telehealth services, can receive support from anywhere in North Carolina with online therapy. We offer specialized care for not only the LGBTQIA+ community but also the BIPOC community and neurodivergent folks. We offer a variety of mental health and therapy services, including trauma therapy, PTSD treatment, and grief counseling.
We can’t wait to meet you!
